So long Kitwe!

We are wrapping up our time in Kitwe. It has been a great 5.5 weeks here and I'm getting sad to be leaving so soon.
First, I'll update you on the past week...
Last Thursday we went to a recording studio, yes recording studio, that Lillian's son helps run. A couple of the older boys work there and plans had been arranged for Ava Michelle to sing a song with this Zambia artist named "Q". So she is officially going to be a Zambian pop sensation- unfortunately it will be after we leave so the fame will all be virtual. While we were there, everyone kept asking me to sing and not believing my claims to being tone deaf. Another owner named Truth asked me to help with their "logo" and by "logo" they meant "slogan". They wanted a loud, high-pitched voice- I was perfect for the job. So unless they find a better fit for the part, their slogan: "MEC Music Productions... We Jazz It Up!" will be in my voice!

They had a Christmas service at church on Sunday. We showed up at 8:30 am (the time the service was supposed to start) with our improvised version of macaroni and cheese (which was a hit!) Well, even Christmas happens on Zambian time apparently!
Supposed line-up:                                Reality:
normal service: 8:30-10:30                   normal service: 9:20-12:00
caroling: 10:30-12:00                           announcements and random time-fillers: 12:00-13:00
lunch: 12:00-14:00                               lunch: 13:00-15:00
But don't worry. There was a dance party during worship. They called different groups- mothers, fathers, youth (ages 18-35), children- down separately to praise Jesus by moving their hips. As if we ever think we go unnoticed, Pastor D called us out when he asked the youth to come down. He said, "Risa and Michelle, that means you!" Of course we followed suit and danced with the other "youth". After the sermon, Dr. Mwila asked us to come and speak about what we've been doing at Dayspring. We did (in slow English) and thanked them for their hospitality. Then the whole church prayed over us for safe travels, good experiences and success finding jobs back in the U.S. Supposedly Dr. Mwila is a pretty powerful prayer so we'll see!

Then yesterday = actual Christmas.
Disclaimer: We knew it would be nothing like what we are used to but it was still wonderful, so no sympathy.
We had left out tap water and Weet Bix (these wheat cereal bar things) for Zambian Santa. We didn't have "biscuits" (aka cookies) or nshima and Zambians don't really "take" (aka drink) milk. I guess Santa wasn't impressed with our attempted substitutions because our offerings were still there in the morning, with no additions. We went to Grace to see the boys and hang out until Lillian came to get us. Finally her husband came an hour and a half (still on time, even early, for Lillian) and we went to their home in Riverside to join Lillian's sister, the Mwilas' four biological children, their "burse" (aka maid/nanny) and about seven of the younger kids from Dayspring who didn't go home for Christmas. We had lunch and honestly, the spread wasn't far from what we would have had at home- turkey, ham, potatoes (sweet and regular), gravy, yellow rice, cake and tea. It was delicious! The only thing missing was apple pie...
The boys at Grace didn't have their Secret Santa gifts ready so we postponed to today- hopefully an extra day was sufficient time to prepare. All in all, it was a great Christmas. Freedom from all of the fuss was a relaxing treat and not knowing what to expect allowed for a day of pleasant, simple surprises. Lillian invited us back for another African Christmas next year but I think I'll give in and plan on enjoying an American one (at least to some extent).

Countdown to departure from Kitwe: 3 DAYS! And I feel like we have so much to fit in. I'm not going to lie, I've contemplated the possibility of just spending our last two weeks here, where we've made friends and know our way around and are comfortable. But as soon as I let myself utter that last word, I realize that is exactly why we have to go. We've done what God planned for us to do in Kitwe, at Dayspring. The friendships we've built and invested in will no doubt continue on. The things we've learned- from Bemba phrases to flexibility to cultural tidbits to trusting in God's timing- will make the journey with us to Livingstone, then to Asia and finally back to America.
I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and enjoy bringing in the new year!

Joy to the World.

Countdown to Christmas: 7 days.

How can that be? It feels like July here. There are no "Holiday Sale" signs in store windows. Christmas decorations are a rare sight. There is no talk about who is left to buy for or when to fit in all of the gift exchanges. In all of those ways it feels like anything but the December that 22 years in America has accustomed me to. And for all of those reasons, I can imagine that a lot of people back home are thinking, "Poor Risa. She won't get to spend the holidays with her family. She won't have gifts to open on Christmas." 

But that's not the case at all. I am beyond excited to celebrate a Christmas free from the commercialization and materialistic display that it has become in the developed world. For the first time in years, I'm not hurrying to get the PERFECT GIFT for each of my loved ones. I am not recovering from the stress of final exams. I am not overindulging in all of the special treats that the holidays bring. Rather, I get to spend a lot of time with boys who don't really have families. I get to enjoy the Advent services that Pastor Mwila has given to prepare us for Christmas. I get to be pleasantly surprised every time I see a Christmas tree instead of expecting every "hall to be decked". 

And as far as the family part of Christmas...

Of course I will miss Christmas Day with my parents and my grandmother. And celebrating with my boyfriend and all of my best friends. But the people we have met here are as good a substitute as I could ask for! The boys at Dayspring, the staff at Kambalange (our hostel), Ivor - they are my Zambian family. That's what the holidays are all about, right? Celebrating the birth of a little baby, not a fat man coming down the chimney with gifts. Enjoying time together with people you love, not stressing over the house being perfectly decorated or Christmas dinner being ready on time. Rejoicing in the promised freedom that God made manifest over 2000 years ago. One of my really great friends included the following in her email this week:

7.  MERRY CHRISTMAS.  I pray you are not saddened at what you are missing this Christmas, but that you are rejoicing at the simplicity of receiving the only gift that matters.  Praise God that you are not clouded by the unnecessary supplements that, while nice, seem to make us a little more numb to the glory of the gift of Jesus Christ.  This thing called awe.  Practice it this Christmas while you have nothing blocking your view.

What He promised is what He gave.

Ironically, I had already started writing my blog post and through her message, God just affirmed that I was writing what He wanted.

Dayspring Church is having a Christmas service and luncheon on Sunday. Ava Michelle and I have volunteered to make macaroni and cheese- not common in Zambia so either everyone will love it or no one will eat it. I'll let you know how it goes. Then Lillian has invited us to her house for Christmas so we will spend at least part of the day with her family. We have set up Secret Santa with the boys (2 rules: 1. Keep it a SECRET. 2. Gifts have to be homemade). Hopefully we will be able to do our exchange with them on Christmas Day as well. I am super excited/interested to see how it turns out. 

So it may not look like Christmas here in the sense of the weather or the decor or financial expenditure. But the reminder that we are dearly loved children of a God who rejoices over every little thing we do is a pretty good illustration of the holiday season. 

May you celebrate in all ways glorifying to Jesus and the promise he came to fulfill. May you enjoy this season and find rest, peace, and joy. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

When in Zambia...

Our biggest accomplishment in the past week has probably been finally learning Bemba.

I'll share our newest/ most useful phrases...

How are you? : Muli shani

Fine: Bwino (that's the only response they teach you so if you aren't really fine, fake it.)

Good morning: Mashi bukeni

Where are you going?: Mulea qwisa?

See you tomorrow: Toco monana milo

Nice to meet you: Chawama ookuku manna

I miss you: Ninku fuluka

Come: Sa

Yes: Ehhhhhhh

No: Ah way

Mom: Bamami

Dad: Batata

Thank you: natutella

How did you like it? (talking about food): Mwali la

Too much: Sana (again, the only response they taught us)

We will keep learning more. Probably just in time to make it to Cambodia where they speak Khmer (I don't even know what that sounds like!!)

Also, we taught the boys at Dayspring how to shag, Wobble, and the Electric Slide. It was a big day. 

In other news, there is a baby praying mantis currently sitting on top of my computer in a sumo stance. No big. 

Sorry I don't have more exciting stories or deep, contemplative reflections. BUT we have officially been here for 4 weeks!!! As always, thanks for the prayers, emails, and thoughts.

Feel free.

I still wake up every morning and have to remind myself that I'm in Africa but we have finally fallen into some sort of routine. Bear with me as I try to fill you in on the events of the past week while finding the balance between "sufficiently illustrated" and "overly detailed".
Last week was our first full week at a single organization- thank goodness for consistency! I think that more than wanting to know what our schedule held day to day (that still changes on us often), I wanted to see the same kids over and over so I could build relationships with them. I've mentioned this "new" place before- Dayspring Ministries. It consists of a church pastored by Joseph Mwila and two "orphanages" run by his wife, Lillian. The 21 boys stay at Grace Center which is at the same place as the church and about a 7 minute walk from our hostel. The 20 girls stay at Faith Center which is a 10 or so minute bus ride in a place called Luangwa. I hesitate to call the establishments "orphanages" and their residents "orphans" because it feels anything but. It is actually called Dayspring Street Project so a lot of the kids were taken off of the street or from homes where their parents couldn't care for and send them to school. (In Zambia, you need to be sponsored to go to a good primary school and a lot of families can't afford that.) The kids are required to maintain contact with their families and being the holiday season, many of them have left Dayspring to spend it with brothers, sisters, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.
We divide our time between Grace Center and Faith Center and try to hang with the kids for about 4 hours or so a day. We have been working with the younger kids on their reading. It's actually really cool to see how excited they get about sitting down and working through a book. There are times when I need a break from helping them sound out words before they are ready to stop. I've even caught the 10th and 11th graders engrossed in the fairy tale books I snagged from Faith. The boys love frisbee so we throw it around a lot. We are planning to teach the girls to bake something "American" for the Dayspring Christmas Party on Friday. Chocolate chip cookies are always a winner but Zambian grocery stores do not have have the baking supplies that Food Lion has and we don't have access to a functioning oven. We'll figure something fun out.
I know it may not sound like it so far but we've even managed to have a life outside of Dayspring. Zambians are so hospitable and this is easily one of the friendliest places on earth. Whenever we go somewhere, they always greet us and then say, "Feel free. This is your place."
Saturday we attended a Kitchen Party (basically a Zambian Bridal Shower) with Ivor. We wore our new African dresses, called "chitenges", which apparently give us credibility. People kept talking to us in Bemba expecting us to understand and someone even asked if we were Zambian! We spent the first hour or so outside with the women as we ate the first round of food they would offer us. Thankfully I wasn't too hungry because the meat was chicken feet and chicken heads. I'm all for trying new things but I think anything with a beak attached is where I draw the line. I stuck with nshima and a piece of regular chicken. After a while, Ivor invited us to join him and the men inside. We sat and talked until the bride's family arrived and what an entrance they made! The men (plus Ava Michelle and I) shifted to the outskirts of the room and then women came in from every direction. Some were carrying pots and drinks on their heads while others crowded around and joined in with chanting and shrilling. All of a sudden, people started throwing money on the floor in front of the women with the food until they set it down and then the eldest woman explained what each dish was. The "hidden meanings" behind the ceremony were explained to us by one of the older men. The bride's family coming to the groom and his place is a sign that he is now welcome at their home as part of the family. The food brought is representative of a typical meal he will find at the bride's family's home. And if enough money isn't offered when the women come, they can leave with the food. Talk about a sure way to kill a party! The women then left to prepare drinks and plates while the men took turns privately offering the groom advice. Then, of course, we were invited to eat again! As we left, the groom (Daniel) invited us to visit his and his wife's place for dinner before we leave Zambia. Meal invitation #2 (#1 was Lillian's last Monday).
Sunday we went to Dayspring for church. They call themselves a charismatic church and when they worship, they WORSHIP! Everyone was dancing as they sang and boy, was it a joyful noise unto the Lord! They even sang songs by Hillsong and Matt Redman! (I let the worship leader listen to my iPod today and he wants to copy my worship music so I wouldn't be surprised if Phil Wickham and Sidewalk Prophets make an appearance soon.) It was so encouraging to hear the excitement in people's voices plus mixing Jesus with dancing is a win-win situation. Pastor Mwila talked about how each of us is a member of the royal priesthood and that being so, how important it is that we spend our lives fulfilling the assignments God has for us rather than pursuing our own agendas. What good truth. Pastor Donald, the worship leader, had us to his home for lunch with him and his wife, Precious. Again, delicious food and plenty of it. Plus he informed us that when we clean our plates, it sends the message that we are still hungry which is why Zambians insist we eat until we are about to explode. Mental note: leave food on plate. He insisted on showing us his and Precious' wedding video and telling us the detailed version of how they met. And again, as we they decided we come back before our time in Zambia is over. Meal invitations #3 & #4.
Last night was probably the strangest meal situation. Background: A couple weeks ago, we met these Egyptian contractors who are building a shopping mall. They were having dinner at the restaurant attached to our hostel. By chance, we ran into them last Thursday at a take-away called Food Palace. We bonded over the fact that we are all foreigners with little knowledge of the city and few friends. (Of course that has changed significantly for us). They invited us to "Indian Monday"- which is usually "Indian Friday" and what they deem their weekly meal at Sazzy's Indian Cuisine. It was great conversation and cool to hear about Egypt and make mental lists about all the things we should when we finally make our way to the Middle East- on the next world tour of course. So there's one for the record books: 2 Americans eating at an Indian restaurant with Egyptians in Zambia. Talk about culture shock.
Side note: Hitchhiking here is safe and if you can't find a taxi, a lot of times someone will give you a ride if you are going in their direction. On our way back from Wusakile (yes, the town names are crazy) Saturday night, Ivor got us a ride to our hostel with a South African. Are you allowed to add "hitchhiking in a foreign country with a foreigner" to your bucket list after you do it??
Sorry this is so long but I hope it gave you a little insight into our life here. I still have a hard time believing this is really happening sometimes but I am so grateful for all the friends we've made and all the experiences we've had in such a short period of time. I guess the lack of a schedule allows for crazy adventures like these.
For those of you partnering with Ava Michelle and I in prayer, please continue to lift up our time here. That we find a balance between patiently letting God guide our way and taking advantage of opportunities He gives us. Also for everyone at Dayspring- the staff who so sacrificially give their time and money and love, and the children who are so filled with joy and already stealing my heart.
Tell America hello for me (and if you feel the need to whip up some oatmeal chocolate chip cookies in honor of our culinary venture failing on Thursday, feel free).

Just listen...

You know something, this isn't so bad after all.
I've been trying really hard to listen to God the past two weeks. Trying to figure out why he brought us here and what we are supposed to accomplish in the next 8 weeks. The other morning I realized that maybe this isn't all about what God is going to do through me for Zambia but what God is going to do in me away from the distractions of America. Living in a slow town with a lenient schedule and few friends takes away all of the things I used as excuses to not be alone with Jesus. Here God has all of me because I don't know where else I can let myself be.
When I miss home, He is the most comfort I could desire.
When I doubt people's understanding of what I want from my time here, He is telling me to relax.
When I get frustrated by people continuously pointing out that I am White or passing me in lines or speaking in a language they know I can't understand, He is reminding me that He knows me and He loves me and in the midst of everything, THAT IS ENOUGH.

Zambia is a lot more fun when you're goal is to just sit back, relax, and make the most of everything.
Sunday we went to a dam/lake thing. Taught a family how to play Ultimate Frisbee. Watched little boys break dance. Saw a Zambian pop concert.
Monday we got to see Dayspring Street Project (the new orphanage we will be working with in Kitwe). We played Frisbee and cards with the older boys. We taught the younger ones how to play charades (basic English words of course) and ninja. That was a hit! (literally). In the afternoon, Ava Michelle and I ran errands- what?! I have errands in Africa? Lillian, the owner of Dayspring had us over to her really nice house for supper. She explained all about the Project and the kids and her vision. It was so awesome to hear about how feeding a couple kids porridge one morning turned into rescuing more than 40 boys and girls from the streets, teaching them how to take care of themselves, and being the family they thought they'd never have.
Today we had a plan to go to the girls' orphanage that Dayspring runs. Ha! Lillian took us to the market to get material for dresses we need made for a Kitchen Party on Saturday (I'll tell you about it once I know what it is). Then we had to pick up her friends and all of us went to the tailor together. Note: the "tailor" is a lady with three kids running around who made Lillian lunch because she was hungry then all the ladies talked for an hour before measurements were even taken. We made a quick stop by the girls' orphanage (which is called Faith) before coming back to our hostel.
All that to say that I'm really starting to get the hang of Zambian life. Trading punctuality and check lists for friendships and a good laugh. Shedding the doubts and anxieties that overwhelmed me a week ago and replaced them with excitement and hope for what the next six weeks holds.
Thanks again for everyone's love and support. It means more than you could even imagine.

Risa meet Zambia. Zambia meet tie-dye.

So I was trying to explain what "hippies" are to Ivor the other day and clearly I pointed to the tie-dye shirt I was wearing. He said that the people in Senegal like them, but people in Zambia don't really wear tie-dye. To enlighten the rest of you on Zambian culture, here are some fun facts...
- The staple food is nashima (pronounced "shima") and it is made from ground corn. Everyone is always so surprised that we've eaten it and like it. Ivor said the longest he's gone without nashima is 1 day. What?!?
- English is the official language but only in theory. Each province has their own language- Bemba being spoken where we are now. "Muli shani" means "How are you?" and "Bwino" means "I am fine". That's the only response we've learned so if I'm not fine, I guess I just lie.
- Drivers have no mercy and crosswalks mean nothing. We've almost been run over a number of times.
- In Bemba, "white people" is "Musungus" and people have no problem pointing and yelling that as we walk down the street.
- We are the first white people some of these Zambians have ever seen.
- Everyone here loves Obama and Zambia as a whole seems to have followed the election pretty closely. Makes me feel a little bad for being American and not liking American politics.
- The education system is not so great. Kids can pay their teachers to pass them even if they fail exams. Children don't learn to read English until 5th grade! Plus they only go to school from 8:30 am to noon.
- After a couple has been dating for 3 years, the girl can sue the guy if he hasn't proposed yet.
- Today we were accused of not wanting to make friends in Zambia because we didn't have a phone. We told the random guys who offered us their seats in the park that we (Ava Michelle and myself) are always together and our Zambian friend (Ivor) knows where to find us.
- The bigger the corporation, the more expensive the product. So I guess McDonald's and Wal-Mart have it all backwards.
- The mosquitoes that carry malaria bite between 02:00 and 04:00 am.
- Most people rotate between 2-3 outfits because that's all they have.

I'm trying to upload pictures but it's proving difficult so hopefully they will be available soon.

God's got jokes.

Disclaimer: I intended on posting this last Friday but ran into some Internet trouble.

It still is kind of surreal that we are in Zambia, a days worth of travel away from home, surrounded by people who look at us like we are foreigners. Oh wait. 
Let's start from the beginning. All of the flights were great. The people were all helpful and friendly (for the most part). Even the 15 hour flight from New York to South Africa was pleasant. Getting Visas and getting into Zambia was surprisingly simple- thank goodness. Oh and did I say that we got to board a plane from the runway? That has always been a small dream of mine. Bucket List... check! Ivor was at the airport with a paper that read: 

LOVE VOLUNTEERS

Ava Michelle Brewer & Risa Chavez

That' s us!!!
After waiting for what seemed likeforever for a taxi, we loaded up our things and headed to Maramba, Livingstone. Then Ivor dropped the bomb. Or bombs I should say. We were informed that we would only be at the orphanage in Livingstone for 2 days (Thursday and Friday), helping with a church's children's program on Saturday, then seeing Victoria Falls on Sunday. Great first 4 days right? Well then Monday we will be boarding a bus for a 15 hour ride bound for the Copper Belt. There we will help Ivor's sister with her children at a Catholic School for "1 week or 2 -however long you like. Then if you want to stay in the Copper Belt we can find an orphanage for you to work there" as Ivor says. Whoa. What?! What about Livingstone? What about Heartspring Orphanage? What about my perfect imagery of walking to work in the mornings waving to people I recognize? What about settling down into our cozy little hostel? Ava  Michelle and I had our little panic attack over all this being sprung on us once we are already in the country. After some prayers and rationalization, and moving into our more- temporary- than-not room, we ventured into town with Ivor to exchange money and get phones.
The exchange rate here is basically 1USD = 5,000 Zambia Kwacha. So we feel a whole lot richer here than in America. As far as the phone thing- you see I have this really sweet boyfriend who went through a lot of trouble and made some pseudo-sacrifices to make sure I had a phone to bring with me. Most of you know that I'm not big on technology and would have considered not going through the trouble of getting a phone should I have any idea what the next 8 weeks holds for us. But because of all the uncertainty I thought it best to have some form of consistent communication. Ha! After visiting 3 stores to get SIM cards, getting the cards cut to fit A-Shelle's iPhone, and trying to get my phone unlocked, we deemed it a lost cause. So for the time being we are going to try our luck with Wi-Fi .
We got a solid 11.5 hours of sleep the first night thanks to not/barely sleeping Monday night before we left then not really sleeping well on planes. The next fiasco was trying to withdraw money to pay our program fees. The ATMs are not American debit card friendly and bankers look at us like we're crazy. Hopefully Plan C to get money will work out today. Throughout all of this my prayer has been that the kids will make it all worth it. We met them yesterday and they are easily some of the happiest children I've ever met. We played lots of games and danced and sang. They made me sing the Star Spangled Banner solo. Poor kids- I'm a terrible singer. They also taught us a song about obeying your parents which coming from an orphan's mouth, is enough to melt even the hardest heart. After a day with them, half of me is excited to really get to know and invest in them but the other half of me wonders if what we do will even matter in the long run. Volunteers  some in and out of places like Heartspring all the time but even if the kids don't remember us, I want to have invested in their future. I want have given them a chance at a life bigger than they think possible right now. Maybe I'm a skeptic, but playing Little Sally Walker isn't going get them there.
I just feel lost right now. Not sure how much of this trip is about me feeling happy and useful versus how much is doing whatever's does (or doesn't) take to make kids smile. It's finding the balance between going with the flow and inquiring about the purpose of what we are doing.
I told Ava Michelle last night that it blows my mind that God has known all of this was going to happen all along the way. Even as we spoke so confidently about our trip at home, He was just smiling and thinking, "Don't have expectations. I'd hate for you to be disappointed." 
So here's to no expectations. Here's to making the most of Africa no matter what. Here's to loving orphans. But most of all, here's to God having it under control. 

Current update: We are in Kitwe, Zambia (part of the Copper Belt where most of the country's mining takes place). We will be helping our guide's (Ivor) sister teach at the Catholic School. Well, that is one of our tasks. Today the teachers of another school told Ivor's sister that she could use our help tomorrow so we are helping teach there. Once the kids get out for Christmas break, we will work at an orphanage near our hostel. Always an adventure...

this is really happening!

Yupp. In less than 6 hours, Ava Michelle and I will be boarding a plane to Livingstone, Zambia. A lot of people have been asking me what is going through my head right now. My answer is either "nothing" or "everything". There are so many emotions - excitement, anxiety, sadness, joy... I feel unprepared but as ready as I could possibly be. I cannot wait to see those little African children but at the same time I am dreading walking through security, away from America. I am thrilled for another adventure but already crave the comfort that comes with settling down. 

In order to avoid all of the confusion, I have just been going through the motions... 

Getting everything I need for five months to fit in two less-than-fifty-pounds bags. 

Saying goodbye to my best friends. 

Scanning and emailing and making copies of important documents. 

Making sure that Mom and Dad are set for once I'm gone. 

At this point, all of the logistics are as good as they are going to get.

It's all about heart change from here on out. A good friend of mine told me this summer that our biggest prayer is always that God will change our hearts. I'm going to a place that is anything but North Carolina. The food is different. The people are different. The communication is different. Everything is different. But the one thing that is constant is God. In the midst of change and uncertainty and sadness, He promises to be steady and firm. I am so excited to be stripped of everything that I know- everything that is comfortable- so that I may gain more intimacy with the Father than I have ever known. He is the same God in Zambia that He is in Maiden that He is in Cambodia that He is in Raleigh. I pray that He will open my eyes to struggles I didn't even realize existed and that He will literally break my heart for the people around me. I pray that in five months I am not the same Risa who is writing this. 

I know fully well that it isn't going to be easy but I do know that everything will be worth it. Thank you to everyone who has walked through this whole process with me. You have planned surprise parties. You have taken me out to eat. You have given me sweet, thoughtful gifts. You have organized fundraisers. You have prayed for me. You have driven far just to give me a hug. You have contributed to some of the best looking journals Africa will have ever seen. Above all, you have loved me.

I can't wait to share in this adventure with all of you. Stay tuned. I hear things are about to get crazy!!!

let me lay it out for ya'

So I realize that a lot of people don't even really know what Ava Michelle and I are doing for the next five months of our lives. Typically that would have been my first blog post but clearly I had other things on my mind for that one.
If you don't already know this about me, you will quickly learn that I love lists. So here you go...

Nov. 13: leave for Zambia!!!
Nov. 14 - Jan. 12: Livingstone, Zambia

• Ava Michelle and I will both be working at Heart Spring Orphanage during the weekdays- helping cook, cleaning, playing with the kids, tutoring, etc.         (http://www.heartspringorphanage.org/)
• After we get off work and on the weekends, we can explore the city of Livingstone (where we will be living and basically a bit of a rundown tourist spot), visit Victoria Falls, or go on a safari!
• We are living in a hostel in Livingstone, that's all I know.

Jan. 12 - Jan. 18: Cape Town, South Africa

• We realized we have a 10 day gap between our volunteer placements so we decided to spend part of it in Cape Town just relaxing and enjoying the lack of a schedule.

Jan. 19 - mid March (no ticket has been bought yet): Phnom Penh, Cambodia

• We are both living with a family in the city.
• Ava Michelle is teaching English.
• I am working with an organization called International Cooperation Cambodia doing Social Work stuff with orphanages.                            (http://www.icc.org.kh/activities/sky)

mid March - early April: Visiting some family friends in the Philippines.

early April: America bound!!!

As far as progress on pre-trip planning, we are pretty much good to go! We will buy our plane tickets to the Philippines and back home right before we leave. *FYI: the best time to get international plane tickets is 4 months and 1 week before departure date.* Then comes the packing list and trying to fit everything into the 2 bags I have allotted myself. Until then, just enjoying time with friends and trying to get everything squared away for the 5 months I'll be gone. 

belong to today.

All the pieces are falling together.
Maybe not logistically speaking- that's all been under control for a while. But more in the way of me learning and understanding what this next stage of my life is all about & why God has pulled me in the direction that He has.

Overseas

to 2 third world countries

for 5 months

to love.

To love the fatherless. the neglected. the forgotten.

To serve the illiterate. the sick. the poor. 
To show the lost & the broken that there is a security and a belonging that can only exist in & with & through God the Father. And after two months with orphaned children in Zambia, whether they ever even think of me again or not, I pray that they know- truly know- that they will never be alone and they are always, ALWAYS loved.

I've struggling with that word...     BELONGING    ...a lot lately. As I planned for, entered into, navigated, and evaluated this time of transition between college/camp and missions, I was really unsure what the purpose of three months of "living the dream" looked like. It's not as easy as it may seem. As an extrovert (self-proclaimed & publicly-supported), I got lonely a good bit. No one else was in the same boat as me. All of my closest friends are getting married, getting big kid jobs, still in school, or sleeping in grass huts in Asia. I no longer led the familiar lifestyle of a college student- living with my best friends and having things to do all the time. But I also couldn't commit to a regular job since I only had three months in America. 
In short, I didn't belong. Or at least that's what I felt like. I've spent most of my life being a little different- the girl who's okay to spend Friday night at home with her parents or the one who will go to any lengths (and take a lot of grief) to recycle, or the one who is perfectly fine with the idea of getting married "eventually". But this time, "different" didn't seem so great. Rather than feeling independent, I felt lonely. And rather than feeling lucky, I found myself longing for the sense of purpose that all of my friends seemed to have.
Yesterday, when I was reading on the website for ICC-SKY (the organization I am working with in Cambodia), I came across this...

"...over 500 young adult orphans revealed that they fear discrimination, victimisation, joblessness, homelessness and even starvation once they leave the orphanage. Many believe that society does not value them and they fear they no longer have the skills to be part of an outside community."

And that's when I realized what all of this was for and why this transition, this lull, had to happen before I could go abroad. It wasn't that my friends were moving on without me or that I was wasting precious productivity time. God was and still is preparing me to identify with these children. I have led such a blessed life- a loving family that extends far beyond blood, numerous circles of wonderful friends, health, security, opportunity, etc. And while I will never know what it feels like to be abandoned nor malnourished, I now know what it feels like to not really belong. To see all these places in which I used to be a part or where I might be in the future, knowing that right now, today, I don't fit- it's tough. It's tough to wait, to fill time with preparations & explanations & conversations (well that's not too tough), until you get to go where you know you are supposed to be. Sometimes, it's tough to live in the present without wishing that "what's next" will hurry up and come. Sometimes it's hard to be patient.

But today is beautiful, perfect or not, it is beautiful. Busy or not, alone or not, comfortable or not, it is beautiful. I think that's what God needed me to realize before I left. Three months of free time, more or less, was just what I needed to spend time with the people I love, to make arrangements for life after April, and to rest in the fullness of God's grace and trust in His Plan. Knowing and believing and resting in that truth is the first step in teaching these orphans that no matter how awful & sad & lonely their past has been, it's over. And no matter how exciting & "better" tomorrow seems, it's not yet come. What we have is today. We belong in today- where we are with who we are surrounded by. And whatever insecurities or doubts we have, they are nothing compared to the greatness and the fullness of the worth we have in Jesus Christ. For it is through God we are redeemed and by him we called

"Beloved, beloved children".