this is really happening!

Yupp. In less than 6 hours, Ava Michelle and I will be boarding a plane to Livingstone, Zambia. A lot of people have been asking me what is going through my head right now. My answer is either "nothing" or "everything". There are so many emotions - excitement, anxiety, sadness, joy... I feel unprepared but as ready as I could possibly be. I cannot wait to see those little African children but at the same time I am dreading walking through security, away from America. I am thrilled for another adventure but already crave the comfort that comes with settling down. 

In order to avoid all of the confusion, I have just been going through the motions... 

Getting everything I need for five months to fit in two less-than-fifty-pounds bags. 

Saying goodbye to my best friends. 

Scanning and emailing and making copies of important documents. 

Making sure that Mom and Dad are set for once I'm gone. 

At this point, all of the logistics are as good as they are going to get.

It's all about heart change from here on out. A good friend of mine told me this summer that our biggest prayer is always that God will change our hearts. I'm going to a place that is anything but North Carolina. The food is different. The people are different. The communication is different. Everything is different. But the one thing that is constant is God. In the midst of change and uncertainty and sadness, He promises to be steady and firm. I am so excited to be stripped of everything that I know- everything that is comfortable- so that I may gain more intimacy with the Father than I have ever known. He is the same God in Zambia that He is in Maiden that He is in Cambodia that He is in Raleigh. I pray that He will open my eyes to struggles I didn't even realize existed and that He will literally break my heart for the people around me. I pray that in five months I am not the same Risa who is writing this. 

I know fully well that it isn't going to be easy but I do know that everything will be worth it. Thank you to everyone who has walked through this whole process with me. You have planned surprise parties. You have taken me out to eat. You have given me sweet, thoughtful gifts. You have organized fundraisers. You have prayed for me. You have driven far just to give me a hug. You have contributed to some of the best looking journals Africa will have ever seen. Above all, you have loved me.

I can't wait to share in this adventure with all of you. Stay tuned. I hear things are about to get crazy!!!